Returning to myself

I am grateful for my spiritual practices. They allow me to express my gratitude every morning: for the new day, for all that is given and also to set my intention for the day: to be fully present, to be guided in my words and actions. But lately I have come to understand another gift that comes from them; they are an anchor, the golden thread that, when I feel lost, can guide me back to my center.

There is no final arrival in this human experience, the moment we feel that we have arrived some place a new experience, a new place, someone we meet will shake us. For me, and perhaps for you, too, old patterns, old wounds, old fears may resurface. I have found myself immersed, a few times already, in the fogginess of confusion that arrives with those moments in which we may feel overtaken by the things we thought we had already resolved or by the immensity of a new experience. I don't fight this anymore, I simply let it be. I have learned to embrace my vulnerability and the tenderness that comes from moments of confusion with compassion and care.

I may be lost for a few days, sometimes weeks, and then I am gradually brought back to myself through chanting, praying, contemplating or by the gentle fragrance of copal. My spiritual practices have turned out to be a powerful tool not only to help me connect to all that is but also to guide me back to my center anytime I feel I have been swallowed by all the uncertainty, confusion, and challenges that often life brings.

I believe that every time I return I am more compassionate and more loving for in the process of getting lost and returning I have learned and understood something new about this being human.